So, I’ve been so busy this week, that it’s been hard to f
My residence hall!
ind time to take pictures, but I’ve finally got some!
My room
My new best friend and good roommate, Aloe Vera
My room is straight through that bush, beneath the window
Me, crawling through my window.
I arrived at the University on Friday, around 6:30pm. Staff has been keeping us very busy, almost too busy. I’ve made a lot of friendly acquaintances, most of them in my dorm. Freshmen are silly, and I take a perverse enjoyment out of watching their confusion. The majority of people in my dorm are transfer students, which I like. I rented a refrigerator, so now I can keep food in my room without it spoiling. I am living in a double room, but I have no roommate. I think I may loft my bed 1/2 height, and use it to give massages… wouldn’t you pay $5 for a fifteen-minute massage by me?
I met this cute girl, RH. She lives in University, which is the sister dorm to Smith, my dorm. I like her a lot. I knew she was vegan, and then last night I learned she was bisexual. What would be an appropriate first-date activity that I could invite her to? I’ve never really asked anyone out before, man or woman. We’re already very friendly, because we’re in the same orientation group. I just don’t know how to go about asking her out. Should I go for casual, in a way that could be interpreted as either platonic or interested, or should I make my interest very clear? Argh, this is hard.
I’m all signed up for classes, and I’ve bought half of my books. I’m going to be spending around $400 on books, this semester, which is insane. I was not expecting this, and I have trouble breathing every time I think of it. This is why I need to earn some money with massage or something else. That’s only 20 hours of massage to pay for my books. My chem book alone was $166. *shudders*
Today, at 1pm, I’m going with the other new students to the mountains for 2 1/2 days. We get to go kayaking, rock climbing, hiking, etc. Plus, there will be all sorts of bonding exercises. I was concerned that by going on this trip, I wouldn’t get to see JM when he drove back down. However, when I called him this morning, he said he won’t be returning till the 3oth, so that works out just fine!
I have not had much chance to be online, because the internet system here has quarantined my laptop, and I can’t figure out how to free it. I’m going to talk to tech help today. >_<
Me
Last weekend, FT dyed my hair, and then we took pictures out in the forest for her portfolio. I wonder why I don’t look terribly happy? Just FYI, we used Manic Panic for the magenta and teal, and Color Jamz for the purple. Manic Panic is better than Color Jamz, but my favorite brand is still Special Effects. The effects are… special. Very intense, and last a long time.
… is college!
Granted, I’ve been going to the local community college for a few years, now, and now I’ve my A.A., but moving to another state and living in a dorm will be an entirely different experience. People keep asking me if I’m nervous/excited. Well, yes, of course. About the usual, you know, moving to a city where I don’t really know anyone, new school, new living situation, etc. But I suppose what I fear is not being able to bring my craft supplies with me. Not having my own kitchen. I’m a baker, a cook, an artist. I need to find some way of channeling my creative energy, or I become seriously unhappy. But how do I condense about a dozen boxes of craft supplies into 1 or 2? I have no idea.
Right now, I am painting a floral design across the top of the walls in what used to be my bedroom (now it’s DP’s room). This is good, because I have been feeling stressed and frustrated, not having a chance to create. Tomorrow, I’m going to haul out all of my sewing stuff. I’ve lots of fabric remnants I’m going to make into headbands, and my favorite pair of pants are falling apart, so I’m going to patch those. I see no need to get rid of them. Ooh, and I want to try a stuffed bell pepper recipe, for dinner. Yummy!
I used to write, a lot. I wrote letters to people, I journaled, and I wrote poems and short stories. I haven’t really been moved to, for a few years. My creative energy has been focused on sewing, crocheting, painting, and collaging. I make wicked multi-media collages. The last one I did was for a class, and I did it all in one night, stayed up until 3am. I wonder at people who think a collage is just cutting out stuff from magazines and gluing it on a surface. It can be so much more… It IS so much more, to me. Being creative, for me, can take almost any form. I’m not really good at sculpting, but maybe I just need to practice. I love taking raw materials and working with them, so that they take the shape of my ideas. There exists this incredible ocean of creativity inside of me, and I when I channel that into a project, I feel terrifyingly, wondrously out of control and powerful at the same time. For hours, sometimes full days, I can be so totally absorbed in my art that I forget to eat, drink, sleep, and yet I am full of energy. My mind will feel clearer than ever before, and hyper-focused. It is exhausting, exhilarating, and thoroughly satisfying.
Do you ever feel that way? Like there is this amazing potential inside of yourself that sometimes takes control, and it’s absolutely thrilling? I feel like I have the potential to be that sort of powerful creature all the time, the person I was when I rapped my poem about Religion, Life, Death, and Politics at GA 2007. Sometimes I feel so frustrated with myself, because I believe I am the only force holding me back. I get distracted, get bogged down in mundane concerns. I want to become that person, the one who is scary and exciting with power all at once, like a thunderstorm. It’s hard, though. Because I AM human, and I have yet to fully convince myself to leave behind the mundane, that it is not worth my time. Soon, maybe.
The Meandering Wanderer 